Emmett gets bella drunk
by GreekgodEdward
Summary: Summary: Edward goes on a hunting trip to Canada with his family and leaves Emmett babysitting Bella, but what will happen when Emmett wants to have fun with her? rated T just in case
1. Surprise surprise

**A/N: first fanfiction so please don't throw flames at me ) ****hope you like it!**

**Emmett get's Bella drunk**

Summary: Edward goes on a hunting trip to Canada with his family and leaves Emmett babysitting Bella, but what will happen when Emmett wants to have fun with her?

**Chapter 1: Surprise surprise**

**BPOV**

I was lying on my bed, hoping Edward would arrive soon so we could go to his house and see the new Mercedes Carlisle had bought. I know I'm not a "car girl" but I had no choice since Carlisle had personally called me to meet "Betty". I can't believe that a serious and mature per…vampire can be so excited about a stupid car.

Realizing that Edward would take a little more time on arriving, I took my towel and my bag of toiletries from my closet and went to the bathroom. I turned on the hot water and entered the shower. I felt all my muscles relax with it. Quickly I washed my hair with my favorite strawberry shampoo and shaved my legs while I was signing a part of the song sex by Tom Jones

"_Sexbomb sexbomb you're a sexbomb  
You can give it to me when I need to come along  
Sexbomb sexbomb you're my sexbomb  
And baby you can turn me on turn me on darlin'  
Sexbomb sexbomb you're my sexbomb sexbomb  
You can give it to me when I need to come along  
Sexbomb sexbomb you're my sexbomb  
And baby you can turn me on"_

I was singing this when I realized I hadn't brought anything to wear, so I quickly got out of the shower, grabbed my bag of toiletries and headed to my room. I opened my drawer, realizing I didn't have any underwear. Damn you Charlie! I mean … he is supposed to do the laundry once a month and he can't even do it? I sighed in defeat and looked for the Victoria Secret's bag full of very tiny and sexy lingerie that Alice bought me. Obviously, when she bought it for me, I hid it on the top of my closet the instant she wasn't with me, so no one would ever know of its existence.

I started looking for something "decent" to wear when I found a blue push-up bra and a matching blue thong ((picture on my profile)). I took off the towel when I heard an "ejemm…" coming from my bed.

I turned around when I saw a sexy Greek God vampire laying on my bed. Carlisle!! He is so damn hot!

I was about to jump to him when I noticed that he was... WAIT! ... Drooling?! Why the hell is he drooling?

I looked into his pitch-black eyes to realize something. He was looking at me. NAKED.

I looked down to my naked body and started screaming hysterically

"EDWARD STOP LOOKING AT ME IN THIS INSTANT!" that seemed to have brought him back to earth because immediately he snapped his head the other way, looking to the wall.

"B…Bella… Bell…a… Bella" was everything he was saying, but I wasn't paying attention. I quickly picked the towel and put it around my body. Then I tried to concentrate on not hyperventilating and trying to relax so that my red tomato face would eventually go back to normality until another embarrassing episode.

"Bella.. I'm so…"

But I didn't let him finish. Instead I ran to the bathroom were I locked myself. I quickly went to wet my face so that the cheeks could go to their original color.

But 2 seconds after I had closed the door, Edward was softly knocking it.

"Love, are you okay?" yeah right like after that id be okay

"yes yes I'll be out in a moment" I told him softly so that he couldn't hear the embarrassment on my voice.

Obviously, with his super vampire hearing senses he heard it and chuckled.

"oookaay I'll be in your room"

Slowly, I went to the doorknob, turned it, opened the door and went to my bedroom.

I tried to avoid Edward's gaze but he was instantly at my side lifting my chin with his index finger. Even though he lifted my head I looked down with my eyes. The mere thought of what Edward was going to tell me made me blush fiercely

"Bella…" he said with a regretful voice, but I continued looking back

"Bella... Please look at me" awe he is so cute when he speaks with a pleading voice!

"What do you…?" I started saying but I couldn't finish because the instant I looked up he was kissing me passionately

A/N: I didn't know if I had to continue or leave it like that. Sorry if there is spelling problems. Please review !!


	2. Trouble

**A/N:**** SORRY!!!!! That was a spelling mistake i know you people got confused with the "Carlisle" part but my intention was that she was saying something like **_**"oh my god he is so damn hot!"**_** Sorry for all the confusions. Thanks for the people who reviewed. Here's the next chapter, hope you like it **

_Disclaimer: I'm not Stephanie Meyer duh, if not I wouldn't be doing a stupid fanfiction that laughs and ridicules her characters_

**Chapter 2: Trouble**

"_What do you…?" I started saying but I couldn't finish because the instant I looked up he was kissing me passionately_

I couldn't resist so I started kissing him back almost instantly. I wrapped my arms around his neck and tangled my fingers in his hair and pulled myself closer to him feeling every inch of his near bare skin through the towel. WAIT... did I said towel?

Feeling as my cheeks turned cherry red _**again**_ I tried with all my will power to separate our mouths. When I finally did, he groaned

"Bella!, why are you doing this to me?" what? I was doing something to him? ... hmm.. This would be interesting…

"What? What I'm doing to you Edward?"

"Well, it's just that…" but he couldn't continue. Was his cheeks a little less paler?

"It's just that what Edward?"

"You're beautiful… I never imagined you could look… so… so … stunning" I looked down. Had I really done his to him? I instantly looked behind me to see if there was someone else behind me and that he was talking to. _Obviously not Bella, who else would be in your HOUSE?_

_Oh shut up brain_I said to myself. When I came back to a normal person's situation, which is not talking to myself, I muttered a quick thanks to Edward and went to the bathroom to put on some clothes

When I finally got dressed and dried my hair, I went back to my room finding that Edward wasn't there. Had I scared him away with my weirdness?

I quickly started to fell dizzy when I felt that someone grabbed me on a bone-breaking hug.

"Emmett….cant. breathe!" I gasped feeling even more dizzy than before. I heard him chuckle

"Sorry sis… I just wanted to tell you that I have a surprise for you" He told me and then he winked

"No Emmett you know exactly what I think about surprises so I would appreciate if you just tell me what you are planning or don't do it at all" I said putting emphasis on the last part

"Sorry, can't do that, when Emmett, Mr. almighty of the universe decides something no one can change it"

"So… if I tell you that Rosalie is behind you with just a really small Victoria secrets red pajamas?" I totally got him there. The instant I stopped talking he immediately turned around actually believing me! I started to laugh like a maniac.

"Hey! You lied to me? And I thought you were the kind type of girl who didn't hurt other vampires feelings" he covered his face with his hands and started shaking and dry sobbing

"Oh! Emmett I'm so sorry! I didn't know you were going to react like that! Please forgive me" I softly patted his back, hoping that this would help but I think it only made it WORST! He was shaking like crazy and I didn't knew what to do so I only did the first thing that I had in my head: ask for help

"EDWARD!" I screamed as loud as I could making Emmett shake EVEN MORE! Why I'm such a monster? I was so concentrated on hearing if my love was coming to my rescue that I didn't realize that Emmett was actually shaking because he was laughing

OF ME, until Edward appeared through my window, with a desperate look in his black- topaz eyes.

"Bella, Bella I'm sorry I left you, I was at my house and I heard you scream **(A/N: if that isn't possible imagine that it is)**

"Edward, oh good you arrived!, Emmett started crying and I don't know what to do!" I almost yelled desperately

But the moment I finished telling Edward what was happening he started laughing even more hysterically than me.

"Edward!" I screamed as I punched him in the arm with a bottle "How can you laugh like this when your poor brother is suffering!" I told him, while I ran towards Emmett to hug and comfort him. "It's gonna be okay Emmett I'm really so sorry to make you cry, please stop" Now I was in the verge of tears.

"Wh … what!? Bella can't you see that he is not crying? He is laughing for Carlisle's sake!

Edward grabbed Emmett's hands and took them from his face revealing a smiling Emmett. Instantly I took the computer's screen and threw it with an unknown strength toward him. It hit him on the face making him step backwards falling through the window.

Again, Edward started laughing creepily while I had this OMC shocked face. Did I just make Emmett fall from a window? As fast as my slow human speed let me go, I started running to see if Emmett was hurt or something, but I heard Emmett screaming to the window

"My revenge will come in any moment Bella, do you hear me? Any moment Muahahahaha….." Oh no, I'm in trouble know. What I'm going to do?


	3. interrupted passion

**A/N: I know how annoying this author's notes are but I only wanted to say thanks to the people who reviewed, I didn't thought people would actually get to the end of a chapter. So keep doing it so I can make a happy dance ****J**

_Disclaimer: Nope… I'm not her yet…_

**Chapter 3:interrupted passion  
**

_Oh no, I'm in trouble know. What I'm going to do?_

Emmett had just threaten me? What I'm I doing to do… oh Carlisle oh Carlisle; I'm dead… dead, dead; dead as my first pet Pimples who only survived 2 hours after they bought it to me.

I started having a conversation with myself

_(Brain)_**(Bella)**

**Pss… brain? Are you there?**

_Of course I'm here you idiot! I'm your brain I'm supposed to be watching you so that you don't get killed, clumsy _

**Yeah…right. Anyways have you been hearing what Emmett told me like ... 7 seconds ago?**

_Yeah, yeah you should probably be her slave for a day or something I don't care and stop bothering me am being creative in here_

**Oh really? And what are you thinking about.**

Immediately a movie-like thought came to my head. I started concentrating on what I was seeing. It was Edward. Aww he is so adorable. Wait, he is coming to me. What is he going to do? Slowly he started taking he's t-shirt off and then his shoes and socks and pants and…

"Stop you stupid perv!" I yelled to my brain

"Bella, are you okay?" Edward was asking me with a hurt voice. I looked to his face and saw the expression he had, my heart almost broke into pieces.

"Oh, Edward I'm sorry I wasn't talking to you…

**EPOV**

…I was only talking to Stella" Bella told me. Why is she acting like this? Is she having a break-down because of what Emmett said? And who the hell is Stella?

"Bella" I said to her softly "who is Stella?" I could see that she was looking at me like an idiot

"My brain…duh? Who else would I be talking to? You know I would never call you supid perv" I was relief. So that was what she was doing when she was suddenly changing her expression. I thought she had caught me staring at her in inappropriate ways. Yeah! Edward 1 – 0 Bella.

"Well, should we get going then?" She told me, but not before she planted a kiss on my neck. She laughed when I shivered and took her downstairs.

We were about to leave when I realize something

"Bella, did you ate something?" I asked

"Of course I did" she replied. She had an evil smile on her face.

"When did you ate?" I asked her suspiciously

"hmm…" She put a finger on her chin, yeah right, like thinking of the last time she ate was difficult to answer.

"Sometime between yesterday and the day before" She smiled innocently.

"Bella, you have to eat something, if not how are you going to stay conscious when I kiss you" I winked an eye at her, and she stopped breathing. She was just paralyzed so I went next to her and hugged her, whispering in her ear.

"Breathe love" while I started planting kisses though her neck. I started feeling all the passion I had felt before when I saw her in all her glory. I started kissing her fiercely and my love started breathing hard and fast.

**BPOV**

"Bella, did you ate something?" He asked

Why Edward is making me eat after such and agitated morning? All I wanted to do was to see the stupid "Betty" and ask Alice could take care of my back while Emmett was with this entire revenge thing.

"Of course I did" I replied. He wasn't going to win me on this. I smiled evilly

"When did you ate?" He asked with a suspicious tone

"hmm…" I put a finger on her chin, like if I was trying to remember when the last time I ate was. Like I didn't remember!.

"Sometime between yesterday and the day before" I smiled innocently

"Bella, you have to eat something, if not how are you going to stay conscious when I kiss you" He winked an eye at me, and I stopped breathing. I hadn't expected him to say something like that, I mean he's such a gentleman and all that stuff. I was just paralyzed, standing near the counter of the kitchen when I felt strong arms around my waist.

"Breathe love" he told me in my ear, as he started kissing my neck. I started feeling weak with all the pleasure but he just started to kiss me more fiercely and I started breathing very hard and fast.

Soon enough Stella yelled in my head _KISS HIM BACK IDIOT! _

Immediately, I turned around to crash my lips with his and started kissing with a passion which I didn't know were it came from.

My legs started to tremble and he seemed to notice that because he picked me up and sat me down in the counter.

I was starting to feel dizzy because I wasn't breathing anymore when we heard a loud knock on the door

DUN DUN DUN DUUUUUN I hate when people does that but I hate myself so I needed to do this muahaahha evil laugh

Please review!! It really makes me happy to see when you do that. Just put stupid or something but review to know that there are people reading this!


	4. Confessions

**IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE****: FOR THE PEOPLE WHO LOVE JACOB, SORRY GUYS BUT I HATE HIM A LITTLE BIT SO PLEASE DON'T HATE ME FOR WHAT IM GOING TO DO IM SORRY )**

_Disclaimer: I'm not her! So stop asking for my autograph please!_

**Chapter 4: Confessions**

_I was starting to feel dizzy because I wasn't breathing anymore when we heard a loud knock on the door_

I groaned while Edward started sniffing.

"It's the pup" he told me with such venom in his voice that I got a little scared. But then he started laughing on an incontrollable way

"I better go, ill be back after you talk to him" he told me between his laughs.

"No!" I pouted like a little girl who had just lost her favourite Barbie. He looked at me and chuckled, gave me a short kiss on the lips and then I was alone.

Angrily, I went and opened the door to find a desperate Jacob on the entrance of my house.

"Bella, Bella, Bella, Bella…" he was saying again and again.

"Jacob what happened to you, why are you like this!" I hugged him, forgetting all the angry emotions I had before he entered the house

I waited for an answer, but he continued hugging me like a statue. I got backwards to see his face and I saw that tears were coming though his eyes. In that moment I thought that something bad had really happened. If he is crying how Edward could had been laughing? What happened if Billy… oh my Carlisle! Something bad happened to Billy

"Jacob, sweetheart, why are you crying!? What happened? Did something bad happen to someone of the pack? Billy, Emily or someone else?" I took his hand and sat him on the living room's couch.

"Bella, there's something I need to tell you. Yes, something happened to someone of the pack" I gasped "Don't worry nobody died… though I hope he would have" he whispered the last part, like saying this to himself

I was about to ask him something but he started talking again.

"You'll see, remember I told you that Embry's cousin Dexter was coming to la push to spend sometime with him?" I nodded; exactly a week ago he had told me that Embry's cousin, Dexter would arrive today to la push to spend time with his family. It was impossible for him to become a werewolf, because he was relative with the non- Quiluette **(SP?)** side of Embry's family.

"Well, he arrived today in the morning and when I, when I, when I …" He started sobbing with so much pain that I started crying too.

"Please Jacob, tell me what happened"

"When I saw him I… I imprinted on him Bella" So? … I started repeating the words in my head _…I imprinted on HIM… _OH MY CARLISLE! OH MY CARLISLE! HE CHANGED ME… FOR A GUY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

"What?!" I yelled "Are you sure you're completely sure that this is right?"

"Y-Y-Yes" He told me avoiding my gaze

I quickly started hugging him because I was sure that if I stared at him one more second I would have started rolling on the floor laughing. I started biting my tongue to avoid the giggles that wanted to come out.

"And what are you going to do?" I asked after a few minutes looking on his pained face

"Well, after I told the pack and they laughed at me Embry told me that his cousin was actually gay, so I think tonight at the party I will open my heart to him"

My lips started twitching as I was trying to avoid laughing. Apparently he noticed, because immediately he stood up, looked at me with a killing glare and stomped out of the door, turning into the brown wolf I loved so much

The instant I didn't saw him anymore I started laughing so much that my sides hurt badly and I didn't have any air left on my lungs. Suddenly, my vision started to become blurry until it went black. My lasts thoughts were: damn! I can't even laugh without having and accident, but before I went completely black I felt strong cold arms around my waist


	5. Finally there

**A/N: thanks for the reviews!! This is a very very very short chapter**

_Disclaimer: NOT HER_

**Chapter 5: Finally there.**

_The instant I didn't saw him anymore I started laughing so much that my sides hurt badly and I didn't have any air left on my lungs. Suddenly, my vision started to become blurry until it went black. My lasts thoughts were: damn! I can't even laugh without having and accident, but before I went completely black I felt strong cold arms around my waist_

I opened my eyes feeling a little bit dizzy. I was seeing black dots everywhere but finally they stated disappearing.

"tsk..tsk..tsk…Bella, what am I going to do with you, huh?" my angel told me while he kissed my forehead.

Then, I realised that I was sitting on his lap and we were on the couch. I smiled sheepishly at him but my stomach interrupted us.

"time to feed the pet!" said Edward laughing

"Hey! I'm no one's pet, your just jealous because you can't eat this exquisite food" I told him, while showing him a box of cereal.

"Of course I can eat it, no one can stop me" and before I could do anything to stop him, he grabbed the box of cereal and started eating it. This is so hilarious!

Almost the instant he put the cereal in his mouth he started gagging and I couldn't help but laugh of the situation

I looked around to see that I was alone, but 2 seconds later he was coming down looking at me with a sick face

"Awwe, poor Eddy had a bad experience with cereal?" he looked at me and growled

"Don't you dare and growl at me Edward Antony Masen Cullen!" I yelled at him with my angriest voice.

Immediately a regretful face appeared next to mine. "I'm sorry, can you please please please forgive me?

"Hmmm… okay but don't ever go there and steal my cereal again is that clear?"

"Sir, yes, sir" I laughed

After I finally ate, Edward took me to his car, opened the passenger door for me, as always, and we finally headed to Edward's and soon-to-be-my house.

When the house came to view I could see that there was someone bouncing up and down at the entrance of the house, but it was way to much tall to be Alice. As we approached to the house I realised that the person who was jumping hysterically was Carlisle

**A/N: I know this chapter really sucked but I wanted you to know that im still alive and want to continue writing this story. I haven't been able to do it before because I was on exam period and I have 3 more exams left but don't worry because my holidays start officially on Friday so I will be able to write many chapters so please be patient )**


	6. Meeting Betty

**A/N: I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO sorry for not uploading in such a long time, but my older brother got married a couple of weeks ago and my mother and I were organizing everything for "the big day"but now let's go on with the story… **

Disclaimer: For Christmas I asked to be Stephenie Meyer, unfortunately Santa didn't make that dream come true.

Chapter 6: Meeting Betty

_When the house came to view I could see that there was someone bouncing up and down at the entrance of the house, but it was way to much tall to be Alice. As we approached to the house I realised that the person who was jumping hysterically was Carlisle_

"Why the hell is Carlisle jumping up and down in such a gay way?" I asked with a confused tone to my love

"Betty…" was all he said

Edward parked the car in the garage and was coming to open my door when too soon somebody else had opened it for him: Dr. Carlisle

"BELLA!!!! WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG, GIRL!" wait… was this person really Carlisle? Who was him and what did they do with the real Carlisle. I knew it! I knew it! Vampires ARE bad, they kidnapped their leader so someone else could be in charge of the coven. I bet it was Esme, she is too good to be true….

"Bella! Are you listening to me?!"

"I… of course" I told him remembering what he had asked me "Well Carlisle, as a Doctor, you should know that humans need to sleep and eat more frequently than vampires like you **AND** by the tiny little fact that humans like me don't have your super fast power"

"Oh… right" he told me a little embarrassed. "Well, that doesn't matter in this moment, what really matter is that you finally have the chance to meet Betty!! Aren't you excited!!?" He was just like Alice when she takes me shopping. This was so hilarious!

"Of course Carlisle!! This is the best thing that has ever happened to me!" I replied the same line that I always tell Alice when she takes me shopping, but as I have the best luck in the world Alice appeared and heard everything

"WHAT?! I thought that shopping with me was the best thing that had happened in your life!" I gave her a pleading look and started thinking in a conversation I would have later with her where I explained that it was just so Carlisle would leave me alone. So like 3 seconds later she started having a vision, my vision, and smiled.

"I'll see you later bella! So you can tell me EVERYTHING I need to know" Great! So know Carlisle and Alice are happy, that's something.

After like two hours admiring Carlisle's new car ..oops.. after two hours admiring "Betty" someone from the hospital called Carlisle to tell him that there had been a massive car crash and that they needed him. God bless alcohol and drunk guys.

"Well, when I come back Bella, you will have the honour to give Betty her first bath! Isn't that exciting?! I'm guessing that you can't wait know. Can you?"

"Of course not Carlisle, I will be thinking about that all the day" Yeah right…The only thing that can be in my mind all day is my love, Edward.

After I waved goodbye to Carlisle, I got inside the house and went to Edward's room, to find him with his eyes closed while he was listening to something. I went closer and I realised that he didn't notice that I was there, so as quickly as I could I jumped on him, but my plan didn't went as I expected.

**A/N: I really didn't like this chapter so much but it's because i haven't written in so much time. Hope you liked it!**


	7. We're leaving

**A/N: I know I know… why are you such a lousy woman? –sigh- I guess I don't know but I finally updated YAY so for the people who had been expecting this (maybe you all lost your hopes but it doesn't matter) it's finally here! I know it's short but I'm already writing the other chapter I'll upload again in 1 hour or so. Hope you enjoy it. SORRY IF THERE ARE SPELLING MISTAKES OR ITS NOT AS COHERENT AS IT SHOULD BE!**

Disclaimer: Not her…

Chapter 7: We are leaving

…_as quickly as I could I jumped on him, but my plan didn't went as I expected._

The second after I jumped he opened his beautiful eyes grabbed me in the air and for some strange reason that I can't understand we ended on the king sized bed with him on top of me

"Did someone want to scare me?" He asked while grinning mischievously

"Yes, but my plan didn't work" I said while pouting

"Well… but we can do more interesting things than scaring each other"

"Really? Like what?" I asked feigning curiosity

"Things like this…" he said coming nearer and nearer to me. Just when his cold lips were about to touch mine someone knocked on the door

"What!" Edward shouted, obviously annoyed that we were interrupted

"Can I come in?" a soprano voice said from the other side of the door, I should have known it was going to be Alice, my personal devil. If she could read the future, why couldn't she wait until Edward finished doing what he was going to do to me.

"NO!!" Edward roared, scaring the hell out of me as his mouth was only inches from my ear, nearly leaving me deaf "sorry" he said after he realized what he had done. I smiled at him

"But Ed-wa-rd" Alice whined "We are waiting for both of you in the dinning room for our family meeting "

"Family meeting? Oh… yes you mean ..that" Edward said while looking at me with a pleading look

"Why are you looking at me like that? Is there something wrong? Maybe I should go so in that way you can talk with you family" I said while picking my jacket that was on the couch

"Silly Bella" said Alice while entering the room " Didn't you heard me? I said 'we are waiting for BOTH of you in the dinning room' Of course you are part of our family. You should know that, I think even Charlie knows that"

"Ohhhh Alice! You're so sweet!" I said while hugging her. I have never been aware that they loved me that much. I know I'm over reacting, I mean it's just a stupid meeting but maybe I'm PMS.



"Anyways, we also need you because you are topic on the meeting so let's go" Before I had time to say anything, she grabbed my hand and started guiding me, while I took Edward's hand.

After we descended the stairs Alice went to the dinning room were the family (except Carlisle as he was attending people in the hospital) was gathered around the table. I took a seat next to Edward and Esme started talking

"Well firstly hello Bella, I'm sorry that you had to see Carlisle earlier in that strange behavior but I wasn't here to control him as I was buying some groceries" She said while smiling at me. Wait, why n earth would Esme be buying groceries. They are vampires! They don't NEED food. Well, human food

Seeing my confused face she looked at Edward instead

"Well Edward, haven't you told her yet?" She seemed surprised about something, as I was. Maybe this is what the meeting was about.

"No Esme, I was planning on tell her later or tomorrow" He said with a guilty expression

"Tell me what?" I interrupted, starting to get annoyed "Does this have anything to do with the fact of you buying groceries?"

"Well, yes and no Bella dear" Esme told me with her motherly tone. "You see—"

"You see _dearest_ Bella," Rosalie interrupted "we are leaving" she said smirking


	8. Revenge

**A/N: well I was going to update sooner, but a friend invited me clubbing the other day and I couldn't say no but here it is… hope you like it**

Chapter 8: Revenge

"_You see dearest Bella," Rosalie interrupted"we are leaving" she said smirking_

We are leaving…we are…leaving…leaving …leave. The words sounded every time stronger in my head like this strange and abnormal echo. They are leaving? But, but why? Haven't I suffered enough for them to just leave me to fall from a cliff and die with my clumsy self? Why did they want to leave me all by myself? Didn't they know I would just trip and die for Carlisle's sake... I think I'm hyperventilating. Why on earth Alice told me 3 minutes ago that I was family to them if now they are leaving.

Suddenly I felt something hard slapping my face

"Isabella Marie Swan!" Alice yelled. "Can't you just stop acting like that for Carlisle's sake, you're supposed to be an adult" She snapped

"I..i'm s-ss-so-o sorry Alice" I haven't realized I was crying "I'm just taken aback, that's all"

"Alice shut up, don't talk to her like that. Rosalie your such a witch. Shall I buy you a broom or something?" It was Edward who talked this time. I gave myself a moment to look to everybody. Alice had a calmed expression in her face, already knowing what would happen next. Next to her was Jasper, looking wary between Rosalie and Edward. Emmett was to his right holding his laughter while Rosalie was fuming next to him. Next to her was Esme looking at me with such a painful expression, suffering with me. Finally I looked at Edward, he was looking at Rosalie with the same expression he looked at me that first time, when we met in biology class and he was doing his best to control his blood lust. Trying to change his expression, I put my hand on top of his. He immediately relaxed a little. Rosalie crossed her arms and looked at me with hatred eyes.

"What Rosalie meant with 'we are leaving' is that in fact we ARE leaving" Esme said. I started hyperventilating again, but she noticed and quickly continued "But only for a couple of days. You see, Tanya's coven and us organized a hunting trip so we could be together for a while but it will only last a week and a half" Relief came to me, I could actually feel how my muscles relaxed when she said this.

"Oh, sorry for overreact then if feel so stupid" I said as my cheeks grew every time more hot.

In that moment Emmett couldn't take it more, he burst laughing and exited the room. We could hear his laughter across the house, then I looked around and everybody was smiling, except for Rosalie and Edward. I looked to his eyes and he smiled hugging me.

"Why are you serious, Edward?"

"Well, actually Bella we still need to discuss your safety while we are not here" Oh…

"I can go to La Push and stay the week there; I don't think Jake would mind…" I said, but then I realized that I couldn't go there as Jake was mad at me for laughing about his issues with 'Dexter'. Edward started chuckling but went to his 'serious' façade once he saw my face

"No, I don't think that's a good idea, especially after you-know-what…" he said trying to contain his laughter. "So we came to a solution, one of us is going to stay here taking care of you"

'Take care of you' what? So now I'm a baby? Someone needs to babysit me? What the heck! I'm a grown up woman why do the do this to me? I was so angry I was about to cry damn hormones that make me cry for everything

"Love, what's wrong?" Edward asked me looking at me with his black eyes. Wow he was really thirsty. I haven't noticed before.

"Just say it Edward" I said with all the bitterness I could muster. "Say it!" I said while tear were running down my cheeks

"Bella what's wrong with you?" Edward asked me with a concerned tone

"I need a babysitter" I spat. In that exact moment Emmett appeared and a new row of laughter filled the room, EVERYONE was laughing at me EVEN Rosalie AND Edward "Hey! You're supposed to confort me, not laugh at me!"

"I know, I know but the way you put yourself was funny you have to admit it" well… maybe it was a little funny. I smiled

"That's better" He said kissing my forehead

"Well Bella but you DO need a babysitter and here he is!" Emmett said while pointing towards ..himself… oh my Carlisle this.is.not.happening. so THAT'S why Edward looked at me with pleading look before exiting his room. Because Emmett will take care of me

It's time for his revenge

**A/N: please REVIEW!.. tell me what you think**


	9. Gone

**A/N: I'm sooo sorry for not updating in such a long time.. this time I haven't got any excuse because I haven't done it because I just didn't want, but I'll try to upload longer chapters or more idk. Anyways, enjoy!**

_Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, just this stupid and drunk plot._

**Chapter 9: Gone**

_It's time for his revenge_

I looked at Edward with the most hatred face I've ever looked him, I think this is the first time I've been really angry with him, and well he deserves it though. I mean, Emmett! Why do I have to be with him of all vampires? I know I won't survive this week. Well, maybe my death will be fast and painless! Or maybe… Emmett is going to change me! In that way I'm going to be with Edward for the rest of eternity!

But wait, Emmett won't do that because if he is planning to do a revenge on me turning me into a vampire is not on the list, so I won't be with Edward for all eternity and definitively not this week. What will I do all the week without him! Maybe I can change their minds, so in that way I will spend the week with Edward instead of Emmett! That's a great plan gosh I'm intelligent.

I looked at Edward, but regretted immediately my previous thoughts. His eyes were so black that I could see my face reflected in his pitch black eyes. I feel so sorry for him; instead of taking care of himself he's been all the time here for me and I don't remember the last time he told me he was going hunting

"What are you thinking, Bella? Do you want me to stay here instead of Emmett?" Edward suddenly asked me, ending my debate.

As much as I wanted to spend a week alone with the love of my life it would be so selfish and I'll put my life in so much danger.

"NO! Please don't. I've been so stupid and selfish thinking on kissing you all the day instead of realizing that you must be so thirsty right now. I'm so sorry" I said as I reached to stroke his cheek with my hand.

"Oh Bella, please don't say such things. You've been anything but selfish and I like it when you try kissing me all day…"

Gently, he placed both of his hands on my hips making me jump a little, but I forgot that when he started kissing my neck. The shivers that ran down my spine were every time stronger, making me come nearer and nearer to Edward

"Edward" I said as I remembered that his family was here

"Mmm…"

"Stoop" Wow that wasn't really convincing, well who can be convincing when someone like Edward is doing that things to you

"Why…" He whined "I like it and I know you like it too and you want more" he said as he started to kiss passionately my collarbone.

"I know but your family is here and you're not in the best condition to have your mouth so close to my neck, not that I'm complaining"

"You're right!" He said while backing off "I shouldn't had done that but it's that you're so alluring and sometimes it's hard for me to resist. Can you forgive me?"

"Of course I do, but you can do all that things once you're back and well fed. Talking about that, when are you guys leaving?" They did told me they were leaving and that they were leaving for a week but they didn't tell me exactly when they were leaving

"Ummm…. About that" he started saying as he passed a hand through his hair messing it even more

"Tell me…"

"Well i…"

"Edward"

"I'm telling you, don't interrupt me"…. Awkward silence…

"Eddie" I said knowing that he hated that nickname

"We are leaving in two hours"

"TWO HOURS! TWO HOURS! EDWARD WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME!"

"Well, I was hopping Alice would came to tell you first so I was waiting" He said trying to hide the guilt

"Alice! Why didn't you tell me before! You knew I was going to react this way didn't you!?"I turned to face her but she wasn't in her seat, nobody was "Where has everybody gone?"

"They left a while ago; they didn't want to bother us so they went to finish packing"

"Oh, so now you don't have anybody to protect you while I try killing you for not telling me earlier" I said. I'm so angry, I mean, when the heck he was going to tell me, was he going to leave me a letter or something or say something like: 'surprise! I'm going to Canada for a week with a hot vampire named Tanya who will make me forget you while I'm there!' Yeah right. Wait… Tanya…

"Love what are you thinking?" A velvet voice said interrupting my thoughts

"You are going to be with _her _for a whole week!" I whined

"Who is her?" Ha! As if he didn't know

"WELL, TAN-YA!? DU-UH?"

Immediately he started laughing so much that you would think he was choking with a chicken bone or something like that. He was laughing so hard that the entire family came downstairs to see what was happening, while he was trying to stop laughing

"Bella….be...bella … hahahah… are…you…jealous? "

"Maybe…" I said huffing while crossing my arms on my chest

This caused the whole family to explode in laughter, EVEN Rosalie

"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?" Everyone stopped laughing at once and I send an apologetic smile at Esme for my language "DO YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY? YEAH OF COURSE YOU THINK, IF NOT YOU WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN LAUGHING AT ME! HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL WHEN THEY TELL ME THAT MY SUPER HOT VAMPIRE SWEETHEART WILL BE SPENDING ONE ENTIRE WEEK WITH THIS…SEXY SUPERMODEL BABE VAMPIRE? DON'T YOU SEE THAT A TINY LITTLE TRIP CAN RUIN AN AAZING RELATIONSHIP I STILL CAN'T UNDERSTAND? I MEAN, LOOK AT HIM AND LOOK AT ME, WHY SHOULD I BE BETTER THAT THE VAMPIRE CHICKS?

"Bella" He growled "You know that isn't true, the other 'vampire chicks' –he said quoting in the air- aren't important for me" he grabbed my face in his hands and spoke in a much tender way "when will you understand that. When will you understand that I love you and only you?" His eyes and his voice where so passionate and sincere that I couldn't say anything for a while.

"Of course Bella, we like Tanya but she will never do what you do to Edward, you have change him, make him a better person and you have show him another way to see this life. You showed him that becoming in vampire was really a second chance to meet you" I was shocked not to say touched by the words that came from Jasper's mouth, I would have expect this more from Esme but not him. I felt how the tears were running down my cheeks as I stared at him.

Without realizing what I was doing I ran toward him and hugged him with all the strength I had. At first he was shocked, but then he hugged me back. After a few seconds of crying on his shoulder ruining his sweater we were interrupted

"So… does this mean that you are changing Edward for Jasper?" Emmett just HAD to be the one ruining the moment. Fortunately Rosalie smacked him and actually smiled! At me

"Even though I don't like you that much I think there can be only one blond super hot vampire in the Cullen family" She giggled and I giggled too

"Okay okay can I have some time alone with MY girlfriend now?"

Everybody started muttering something like possessive obsessive vampire or something like that while hugging me, kissing my cheek or patting my head. Esme was the last one to get out and smiled at me while closing the door.

Edward looked at me with so much love in his eyes that I started questioning my behavior, maybe I'm really PMSing.

"Edward I'm really sorry for acting that way it's just tha-"But I couldn't finish cause his lips were on mine moving with so much passion, trying to express all his feeling without actually saying them. Too soon for my brain but good for my lungs, the kiss came to and end.

"Love never ever in your life doubt the love I feel for you, please" He said while stoking my cheek "I was only laughing earlier and so was everyone else because you have no right to be jealous, I only have eyes for you my love" I looked down ashamed of myself "okay…" he kissed my forehead and trailed down to my lips, when I wouldn't look up he started lifting my head with his nose like a puppy until I laughed and kissed him

"I love to see you happy" he kissed me "It makes me happy too" He kissed me again

"You know, I think you should go hunting away more often" he frowned "in that way your boundaries start dissolving"

"Haha, nice try. Okay let's go to my room to see if I have everything I need"

We went to his room hand in hand to see that his things were already packed

"Thank you Alice" He spoke in normal level but I heard a 'youre welcome' coming from the hall

"Okay I think everything is ready. Are you sure you don't want me to stay here with you?"

"No I'll be fine with…Emmett" I shuddered and he chuckled

"Well then will you escort me to the vehicle my lady?" He said in a sexy British accent

"Why of course kind sir"

When we arrived downstairs everything was ready for them to go

"Well Bella, see you in a week!" Alice said giving me a hug

"Bye honey" Carlisle and Esme came and gave me a hug

"Bye Bella" Rosalie said walking through the door. Well, something is something "Take care of him" She said before entering the car

"I will" I told her

"Hey! I am the babysitter and you are the baby, I'm going to take care of you not the other way

"Bye Bella" Jasper said hugging me briefly. This must be hard for him but I'm glad he is trying

I looked and saw Edward staring at me and I started fidgeting with y shirt starting to feel self conscious

"Bye love" he said kissing my lips gently

"Will you have signal on your cell phone so we can talk?" I asked hopeful

"Sorry love but we will be in an inhabited place, meaning that we won't be able to communicate for some days, but I'll call you as soon as I get there okay?"

"Okay" I was disappointed but it was good for him and maybe for me. He kissed me again with ore passion than the last time.

"Okay, okay no more make out sessions in front of the family, look at poor Jasper trying to keep with your horny emotions" I instantly blushed crimson red and looked at Jasper who was looking at Alice like a kid would look at a piece of candy

"Umm… we better go" Jasper said

"Yeah well bye love. I love you"

"Love you more" I said teasingly

"No, I-" "Okay okay we now you love each other now lets go before I eat Bella" Alice said while dragging Edward to the car.

I watched as they got into the cars and drove away

"Excellent" Emmet yelled and punched the air with his fist

"So…" I started

"So… ?" He said

"What do we do now?"

**Wow, this is my longest chapter so far 1915 words, I know it wasn't that funny but the cullens are finale gone, so …what do you think?**

**REVIEW AND TELL ME!**

**Sorry if there is bad spelling **


	10. Freaky perv

**A/N: I'm not going to lie to you… I haven't upload because I didn't want to, cause I'm very lazy… Even though many of you reviewed and told me to update soon it was Edwards Stalker 126 who made me start writing again so… a silver Volvo and vampire cookies to you (they are made with Esme's secret recipe with a pinch of blood).**

**Another thing, those who had been saying "yeah you should improve your spelling cause you suck at it" well…. Not in those words but something like that, please shut up lol. I'm not going to say "yeah you're right I should improve" cause I WONT! I've been studying my whole life in an English school but that doesn't mean I speak or write 100 correct, so si quieren que escriba todo en español yo no tengo ningún problema but if theres anyone willing to help with my spelling just PM me. Okay enough author's note….ON WITH THE STORY**

_Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, just this stupid and drunk plot._

**Chapter 10: Freaky perv**

"_What do we do now?"_

"Uhhh…. We could … I don't know, all I know is that I'm so happy right now that I will sing and dance for you" Emmett told me

"Okay… and what exactly are you going to sing?"

"PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME IT'S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY, PEANUT BUTTER JELLY, PEANUT BUTTER JELLY WITH A BASEBALL BAT!" He yelled while he did this awkward and creepy dance around the house running and moving like a crazy person

"And you're supposed to be taking care of me… for a week? Are you sure I will be alive by the end of it?"

"I'm not sure, I mean, I'm supposed to take care of you until everyone arrives but if taking care of you means I need to be by your side all day long I think I'm gonna be the BEST babysitter ever" He said while dancing a little

"Sure… just please don't kill me"

"Of course not. If I kill you I won't have anyone so clumsy as you to laugh at"

"That's your only reason to keep me alive? I can't believe you just said that! And I thought I was like a sister to you" Why is he talking to me like that, I thought we could be friends and-

A booming laughter interrupted my thoughts

"You should have seen your face, it was priceless! Of course you are my little sister and I love you" He said while putting his arm over my shoulder "But you have to understand that it's very rude to throw a computer screen to someone's face, so until I find a decent revenge for you I'm going to make fun of you and don't you ever think on complaining because you deserve it and you know that, right?"

I thought for a moment, I didn't want to make Emmett angry so I'll just agree and maybe in that way his revenge won't be so bad, right? "You're right, I won't complain so don't worry. Now I'll repeat my question, what are we going to do now?"

"Oh, oh, oh I know I know!" He said suddenly jumping up and down with his hand up like a kindergarten kid when he knows the correct answer to a question. "We have to tell Charlie that you will be staying here with me for a week!"

"What!, I thought Alice or Esme would have take care of that, saying that I was going on a…super shopping trip with them or something, do you actually think that Charlie is going to allow me to stay here with a boy for more than 10 days?"

"Hey hey Bella, I know you find me attractive and everything but you must know that I'm here to take care of you and besides you know I'm married and there's Edward and all and-"

"Emmet! Eww you're like my brother, I would never cheat on Edward besides it would be like cheating Edward with my brother! Ew!!"

"Hey …but if I'm your brother and I'm also Edward's it means that you two are brothers and are going to have sex together AND YOU KISS EACH OTHER! THAT'S GROSS! YOU ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR OWN BROTHER! GET AWAY FROM ME FREAKY PERV!"

"Emmett what the hell are you talking about, you know it's in a metaphorical way, besides Edward is not your blood brother…" Why is he so stupid sometimes, I mean he is a freaking vampire who has lived for many years, haven't he learned anything in all those years?

"Yeah…you're right, sorry for calling you a freaky perv, you know it was just the situation, I didn't mean it"

"Yeah, yeah I know. Well back to important things, what are we going to do about Charlie?"

"I know exactly what I'M going to do about Charlie" He said suddenly grinning madly. Actually it was a little creepy, if you looked from the angle I was looking at him it seems as if he just committed a crime and succeeded.

"Well if you are involved then I guess I'm involved…you're not going to kill or eat him, right?"

"Nah, he's a good guy and I respect the law"

"Hah! Don't make me laugh please, I think the law is the last thing on your respect list"

"Yes, you're right. Anyways, let's go we have a LOT to do before we go tell Charlie your plan for the next 10 days" He said and we started walking towards the house

"Okay, but what are we going to tell him?"

"You'll see"

"But I need to know, we need a backup plan and everything. Remember that he won't like the idea of me spending many days in a house that isn't mine with a man who isn't my boyfriend"

"No you won't be spending it with another man"

"Really?" I said with a suspicious tone "If I'm not going to spend it with you, with whom then?"

"You will see" he said while going upstairs. I quickly followed, I wanted to know his plan, and probably it was a stupid one.

"When will I see?" I asked in a sad tone voice. He looked at me and laughed.

"On the next chapter of course"

"Oh" And with that, we went down the hall and opened Alice's and Jasper's room.

**If you want to know what will happen next I want at least 10 reviews, so review!**


	11. Sex

**A/N: I'm glad so far many people had enjoyed this story, but what I can't really understand is why some people …cof.. cof… NycBlackout89..cof.. cof… gets mad at me for writing stupid things about the characters, I mean this page is for that, to write what you want about the characters. If I want to I'll make Emmett and Bella have sex while riding a horse or whatever, if you don't like the story THEN DON'T READ IT and go read one where Bella gets killed by the Volturi or something**

**Enjoy!  
**

_Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, just this stupid and drunk plot._

**Chapter 11: "Sex"**

"_Oh" And with that, we went down the hall and opened Alice's and Jasper's room._

Once we were in their bedroom Emmett went straight to Alice's huge walking closet.

"Emmett what do you think you're doing, Alice will kill us if she knows we are here!" I whisper/yelled. I don't really know why I was whisper/yelling, I think it's because my subconscious knows that we are about to do something bad or stupid or stupid AND bad.

"Shut up and help me find what I'm looking for" Emmett said while rummaging in Alice's closet

"And what are we supposed to be looking for?"

"Well, duh… isn't it, like, obvious? What on earth could we be looking for in a closet… a map for Candy Mountain? (A/N: The stupidest video ever link on my profile if you want to watch it... ) it's obvious we're here because we need some clothes"

"But Emmett" I started, ignoring his comment about candy mountain "I don't think Alice's clothes will fit me, I mean, it's not that I'm much taller than her but I am" I started rambling. _'Alice'_ I thought _'If you are seeing this, please ignore it and continue enjoying your wonderful trip to Canada with __oh so wonderful Tanya! __the gorgeous and stupid stunningly wonderful Tanya. God, I hate her…please hit her or something'_ Okay… now I will stop talking with an imaginary Alice as if she could hear me inside my head. I mean, if Edward can't and he has the ability to do it, why Alice would be able to? Maybe she's hiding something! Okay I'll stop talking and being weird and I'll just pay attention to Emmett. "What happens if something goes wrong? I'm scared. Alice could find out and kill us"

"Nah, I don't think so. Besides, if she gets angry then we have a great backup plan!"

"And that would be…?"

"Well, if something goes wrong then you will say something like" He started pouting and batting his eyelashes trying to imitate a flirty girl, maybe he thought it was cute or something. Not. " 'Please Alice, remember that I'm Bella that you love me and that I will play Bella Barbie with you for a month without complaining and you will buy me clothes and pl- "

"Wait, wait, wait. Are you saying that if something goes wrong with Alice's closet or whatever involving her I will be the one to talk to her?" He was getting on my nerves. Bella Barbie for a MONTH!! **NO WAY**!

"Well if you don't want to then I'll talk to her" He stated simply

"Oh, okay" I was surprised by his sudden kindness

"I'll just tell her that you will be her Bella Barbie for a month. Easy as drinking bunnies"

"HAH! Are you kidding me? A whole month Emmett? Why would I do something like that?" So this was all about and he looks at me with that face, thinking I'm stupid, but no! I'm not! "In your dreams! Besides, I still have the blisters from last time I went shopping with her, it hurt like hell! And I'm not stupid so stop looking at me like that!

"You're not? Haha joking dearest Bella, just joking, you don't have to glare at me like that. What I don't understand is why you always act like an adult. You never have fun! I mean I'm way older than you and I still do funnier things"

"Yeah, well maybe I act like an adult, cause I'm one?"

"Well yeah you're 18 but that doesn't mean that you have to be that mature. You never have fun"

"What are you talking about? I do have lots of fun" Is he telling me that I act like a granny?

"Well, tell me one thing you do to have fun" He said smirking, where is he going with this conversation… What do I do to have fun? Let's see… Oh, I know!

"I read books! I loooove to read books" That was a pretty good answer, right?

"Pshhhh, old lady. You know what? I think I'll start calling you granny Bella. Yep, that's a pretty good nickname for you. It suits you" He just NOT called me granny! Seriously, if it wasn't because he is a vampire and his skin is marble stone I would had punched him a long time ago!

"I'm not a granny or and old person! I do other things too!"

"Yeah, right. Funny things like what"

"Well, I have fun with Edwar-"

"WHAT! YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT YOU'VE BEEN HAVING WILD SEX WITH HIM AND YOU HVEN'T TOLD ME?!"

"WHAT! NO! we still haven't… you know sealed the deal…"

"Then you're not having fun with him. "I glared at him. I could have fun without it being sex. I'm not a perv like him" Anyways, back to our original plan. If something goes wrong then I'll buy Alice what we ruined. I have enough money to cover the expenses.

"Well, if you're sure then I don't have problems with the plan"

"Okay, now that you FINALLY agreed to have some real fun" He said while wriggling his eyebrows

"Ewww I'm not having sex with you Emmett, that's disgusting!" He's like my brother! Jesus! It's like wanting to have sex with Jacob – shudders – thank God he's gay, now I know that he'll leave me alone. Finally

"What! I'm not talking about that, you little perv! Why do you jump to that kind of conclusions. I know that now that Rose isn't here you can do whatever you want with me, but you have to understand that I'm a married man and I want to be a loyal one, but if you think that I'm too irresistible for my own good, maybe then we could give it a try. You know, Edward and Rose don't have to know this it will be our dirty little secre-"

"Okay, okay stop rambling. We both know that would never happen, ew –shudders again- it would be like doing it with Mike Newton – both shudder with scared faces at the mental images going on in their heads- . Okay, so how goes this plan of yours"

"Well, listen carefully. I won't repeat it unless you want me to tell disgusting Newton that you're madly in love with him".

**A/N: that's it. I know it sucks but I'm studying for my psychology exam when I suddenly felt bad for leaving you like that without updating something in such a long time. **

**I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!! Since I'm so lazy I would like a beta so in that way I'll have a pressure and I'll write more regularly. Besides, I need someone's opinion before posting the chapters about the plot and to check my orthography. So if anyone's interested just PM me or something. **


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